THE MISSING CONNECTIONS

by Byron Flitsch

"You are not the one."

It was written on a folded piece of light pink paper in black ink. Which, when I turned it over, was written on the back of a gas station receipt.

When you live in the city, you tend to stumble upon pieces of other peoples’ lives. When you share this small space with large amounts of people, you’re bound to find relics of others that have been somewhere before you. Often these relics are hard to decipher much like ancient relics—Egyptian ruins with exotic drawings or faded scrolls found deep in a dug-up tomb. Other times, like in this one line of text on a receipt, you’re given clues to what might have been.

"Maybe it was a reminder note. Something he or she was supposed to say when he got home... to his girlfriend..."

"Or wife..." I interject as I hand the folded note to my friend Mark who’s sitting next to me at a concert a few weeks ago. We're waiting for the show to begin when I pull out my wallet to tip the waitress and the little note fell in to my lap.

Mark reads the note aloud while analyzing it. The handwriting is clearly a guy’s scribbled emotionally maybe while drunk at a bar.

"That's funny. A few days ago, I found a piece of paper that had someone's grocery list on it. On the bottom of the list was 'pregnancy test'. The entire day I couldn’t stop thinking if she was pregnant or not… and I didn’t even know her!" Mark says taking a sip of his cocktail.

"I know! It’s the weirdest thing. I feel like I should know this guy… like I already do know him… is that weird?” I ask taking a swig of beer.

"No…but... I have to ask you something, Byron. Why are you carrying this in your wallet?"

I open my mouth to give him an answer, but instead I pause. I didn't have an answer. The lights lower in the venue and the crowd cheers leaving me with my head tilted and confused. I honestly didn’t know why I was keeping it.

“It’s obvious why you are keeping it.” My friend Jessica said to me while she held the note in her hands in line at a bookstore a few days later. She had to pick up a few books for her history class she was taking. I was paging through a magazine with Jake Gyllenhaal on the cover.

“And why is that?”

“It’s the same reason why archeologists keep digging for ruins and why astronomers still look for new planets and why scientists still try to search for answers under microscopes. We are looking for answers because we are trying to figure out where we come from and where we might be going.”

“So I’m keeping this because I’m…”

“You’re collecting someone’s relationship history… someone’s story. You’re fascinated because you are trying to figure out who you are through this guy’s note. It’s just human connection. That’s what relationships are whether romantic or not. They are all connections. Our stories and histories connect us. This is just a small clue of that.”

As she paid for her books, I put the magazine back and stood in awe.

She was right.

In modern times and hectic life-styles, it’s easy to forget how close to each other we really are. We stand next to strangers on trains and never say a word. We wait in line at coffee shops without acknowledging the people behind the counter. We pound on with our lives without taking a second to realize that everything we do and every thing we say can make an impact on others. Whether it’s a smile, held door or a mysterious discarded note, we all leave trails that make impact. Past, present and futures are all created through everyday connections with people we never meet.

Can we change a future without being present in someone’s life?

For now, that receipt is on my refrigerator. When I fill a glass of water or grab an apple, the pink hue of the paper pops off the white surface. It’s there to remind me that we all have a story of and how we never to settle for just good enough. Every time I see it, I think about the guy. I wonder what happened. I wonder if he will ever find his “one”. I imagine him somewhere new in his life tying his shoelaces, folding a newspaper to do a crossword puzzle and going on with his life never knowing the bold statement he wrote down made such an impact on this complete stranger.

I think about the relationships we will have with people we will never meet. I think about the impacts we all make on others… without ever knowing it.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: When Byron Flitsch isn't pondering the art of relationships, buying magazines he'll never get time to read, traveling without maps, and discussing the meaning of life over a cocktail, he is a freelance writer. He's been published in The Advocate, New City, Gay Chicago, and a variety of print/online publications. You can spy on Byron properly at his website: www.byronflitsch.com